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Dinner Dance

 

December 2nd 1977 saw the Ringways Restaurant Leeds once more echoing to the tramp of Pennine feet, as they gaily enjoyed themselves as part of the pre Christmas festivities. Last year the French, as part of a dastardly El plot to discredit Britain, had lured away many of our prominent members to some Infernal rally designed to destroy L' Anglais in one move, this year however we moved to an

earlier date thus throwing Le Frogs into such confusion that they've cancelled their Rally!.

 

'Wot's all this then' I thought to myself, 'must be the wrong place, 'all these dicky bows and dress shirts, must be the Leeds area finals of 'Miss Britain’ (She's later to be featured in an Icelandic travel agency advert).

 

However on closer inspection I discovered well known fizzogs above the frills and fanciness and they were all fighting for the bar so it had to be the place. What a smart bunch of fella's never knew we had so many sauve types and what about the women then! Where were all the be- wellied, squat, padded, gloved girls hunched against the wind, the only exposed flesh being a red nose stuck out above a scarf and just below a cagoule hood ..... all I could see were long legged lovelies with hair where once only wobbly hats were seen, acres of exposed flesh and plunging necklines it was like meeting people all over again'.

 

About 112 people sat down to a very enjoyable meal and during coffee it was, yet again, Neils turn to speak. Neil's duty this particular night is a very pleasant one,

Joe has to present our 2 Annual trophies and 4 National Trophy.

 

Margaret Hartley was invited to present the trophies as they had organized the Dinner Dance. The first trophy to present was the JB, Close Trophy. This trophy

is awarded to the member, who has, in the opinion of the committee done most to help the club on a completely voluntary basis. This was decided on a points basis, after every event points are awarded to every member who did anything to help on that event, obviously committee members aren’t eligible and one or two other official post's such as club shop. This years winner was a very popular one,

judging by the amount of applause received even though he couldn't be there, the winner was of course being David Green better known to all and sundry as 'Tarmac' Rock on TommyThe next trophy was the Weblo Trophy and in fact thiswas the first presentation. This again was awarded on a points basis, and is for the most successful driver of the year in PLRC events. A points formula is used ie. so many points for a win, 2nd, 3rd, etc. The top two drivers were so close that John Hartley who computed the scores had to go down to who had the least number of thirds on events entered to break the tie. The winner was Carl Amos and it shouldn’t take a great deal of effort to work out that it was Ted Hartley so narrowly beaten into 2nd place with Alan Panter snapping at his heels for 3rd.

 

Carl has had a great year and very successful one with his 2 1/4 Lightweight (Standards rool OK ) but even so he didn’t get a kiss from Margaret hard as he tried'.

 

I only feel it's fair that I should mention some of the others. Barnes was in close running for the Weblo trophy as it is after all an appreciation of the effort they have given. There weree Colin Howe, Dave Feather, Geoff Braithwaite, Margaret Hartley , Carol  Amos, Mick Burdett, Paul Higgins to name but a few

 

The other 4 prizes and awards given by various people in this area to Pennine members  who are successful at the National.

 

Albert Farnell Trophy for highest placed Series 11 in the trial.    Carl Amos

 

Brian Pickup Trophy for the highest placed Series 1 in the trial     Dave Noble

 

Arnold G Wllson Trophy for highest placed member in the Gymkhana.      George Carruthers

 

John Lister Trophy for highest placed member In the Comp Safari.       David Simmonite

 

Last but not least a belated Catterick ‘77 prize for second Range Rover was presented to Ken Campbell.

 

With officialdom now at rest, it was the turn of the dancers It was here that a slight hitch was found as the DJ must have heard who was coming and decided to take his turntable elsewhere, all was not lost however, as the two B's swung

into action to provide high quality entertainment from low quality goods ie. distinct lack of decent records'. We soon had ‘em at it, there's nothing like a quick touch of ‘Viva Espana’ and there all there with the legs in the air and plastic roses in their mouths, like lame Flamenco dancers they were..... still it gave the visitors a laugh Didn’t It Vicarprint ? (Fancy he came to the dinner dance and never even said grace! )

What are you on about Ed? I thought that they were all perfect ladies and gentlemen (not like that phony D.J.) and besides, (I said Grace). Can I be serious for a moment Anne and Me ? we would like to say a big thank you to you all

for having us to your dinner Dance, we really did enjoy ourselves, and It was fun putting faces to names. I must say this though, Brian and Nell must have been leading me up the (Land Rover Path)? you were not at all like I was led to believe. By the way Nell, I put some WELLIES in the car just like you told me - but you were all so well dressed not at all like wot I was led to believe, that I left them there

 

To continue Ed. I don't know who kept sending the drinks to us wot woz playing at Dee Jays, but it's your fault they kept playing at the wrong speed.   All’s well that ends well, and at about 1am it duly did. No one complained so I can only

 

IT’S THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS

 

Barry Jessop, a member of both the P.L.R.C. and Her Majesty's Armed Forces, was recently to be seen up to his lightweight axles, somewhat stuck to say the least. This was out in the wilds of Denholme in a more inhospitable spot you couldn’t hope to find this side of Siberia. The purpose of his being in this rather desolate area of moor s I don't really profess to know, but having found himself in this predicament he decided that help was needed.  Being a la Denholme, which is but a lame ducks walk from Thornton (an equally bleak spot) he decided that the nearest help would be at the local native leaders dwelling. Thus he came to knock upon the Simmonites door's.

 

Luck was with the lad, Melonie was within, but sadly without a Land Rover that ran. Optimistic as ever, she brewed him the drink and bade him wait till David returned with the much needed Land Rover, then he would be rescued in two shakes -of a Drake's tail. David, like Christmas, was a long time coming, but eventually he did return, like St George coming to avenge the Dragon he brought his steed to a halt.

 

Barry's tale of woe was recounted and fortified with yet more of his local brew they sallied forth to yonder mire to rescue his stricken beast. (Like all good Panto stories mine has a happy ending)

 

On arriving at the scene, an amazing sight met their awestruck gaze, the Lightweight, far from being up to the door tops in slime, was stood on dry land bold as brass and as unstuck as ninepenny stamp after a dry lick. Eye

witness reports tell of several fairy Godmothers disguised as Pennine Land Rover Club Members descending on the stricken Lightweight and with goalie tugs from sturdy pumpkins, I mean Landies, they rescued the unfortunate damsel from her distress then they disappeared into the night leaving only the faintest tyre marks to prove they had ever been.

 

(Just after midnight that night police arrested a Pennine member for travelling down Manningham Lane at 40mph on a pumpkin, the defendant protested bitterly that it had been his Land Rover, they accepted his pleas of guilty but insane!)

 

Actually that was a true story apart from the little traditional panto trimmings that I added just to give it a bit of a Christmas flavour; whoever the unknown Samaritans were thanked you from Barry.

 

 
 
MSA and ARC club members are welcome to come along and join our events. Phone Mark on 07866 506521 / 01282 703718

 

 

Pennine Land Rover Club, Pennine LRC