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Other Club's Events


Windy Hill again, it always conjures up visions of mud, bogs, broken
motors, gullies, hills, sweat, bruises - all that and trophies too! You just
can't go wrong, can you? The Pennine is the most competitive club around,
but don't take my word for it - come and see.

Windy Hill, do I have to mention it, a nice event, but the weather,
eurgh! They say that one of the reasons Chi-Chi didn't score in America
was because he can only see clearly for about 6 feet - he would have been
at home at Windy Hill all right, visibility was kind of low, just like the cloud

But, let's start at square one. A couple of days or so earlier a quiet
evening's walk by myself, Jim Burgess and Steve Parker got the rough
locations for the sections, the same boring old ones, and of course a couple
of new ones to play in. Not forgetting of course the Hat bits in between,
most important, hit the right flat patch and you'll sink in past your head-
lights - now you know why we walked.

The next event in this boring old saga of Windy Hill 81 was when, on
the day before the do, we all got together again - all experienced by now -
all previous trophy winners - all experts - all of us knowing the land like the
back of someone else's hand. My LWB got the club events trailer to the
field alright, the sun was shining, the ground was drying, Summer was in the
air, so what do we do? Load up Jim's Lightweight, set off down the hill,
sticks bouncing merrily, over the edge we went, me and Steve bashing
Section 1 in the ground, Jim and 'Our Kid' (You know, that pretty young
slip of a girl who drives about in RoVeR. Well, we know.) going on to
Section 2. They didn't make it! The sun shone, so it wasn't too bad, the
Landies front wheels didn't see it, they were going in for a dose of the
original beauty treatment, a right good bath in Perfume d'essence Windy
Hill. (The next bit is mainly for our Editor who says he's 'into' it. Ersonal-
ly it isses me off.) Permanently plunged in pure, potent, pernicious, primea-
val Pennine peat, persistently permeating past perforated plates, piles per-
culating, perpetually perishing particles probing, predominantly preventing
propulsion. (I'm only claiming 20, dear head it 'er, the rest is down to you!)
What I really mean is the smelly s**t got everywhere and Jim's Landie was
bogged in. No problem for demon aces like us though, get Steve's road
tyred 80" down there, that'll shift it - Bugger couldn't! 'Our Kid's' Landie
couldn't even shift itself back to the top for a bit, them little whizz wheels
whizzed round alright, but it wasn't until we wandered into the next field,
over a wall and went reversing up the hill that things started to come to-
gether again. Anyway, by then it was dinner time so we buried one of the
dead sheep and had our mutton butties. Them sheep were dead alright, they
were moving but they weren't going anywhere. We learnt the hard way how
Perfume d'essence d'Pennine was made, it's not nice.

So, at dinner time I loosened off the horse box from me LWB and set
off to recover Jim. They wouldn't let me take it down the hill to pull the
stuck Landie out, they were saying things like "If 3 litres of V6 80 can only
just get back up the hill a straight 4,2'A litre LWB may not be quite as good."
So off I went, find a telephone (if them CB things were legal I'd have one
just for this) and start drumming out one of Pennine's often heard moor-
land cries, "Can you come and tow us out?"

One of the things about a Saturday dinner time is what you can do.
some go to the pub, others go for a drive, some go to Windy Hill, most
important some meet their lovers, but even more important some lucky

people do all of these'! There it was, round the side of the transmitter mast,
hidden from all on the road, from all on the motorway, from all hikers,
from everywhere except the track from OUR playing fields - the red MkIV
Cortina 4 door saloon. The front seats were empty except for bits of cotton
things, but the back seats were full, there they were, a right good demon-
stration that should have been video'd for showing to Giant Pandas. So I
stopped, to be honest I stalled! There I was, right in the middle of the
moors and even Playboy wouldn't print what was happening there and so,
what else could I do? I reached out and —CENSORED— then Harry Haigh
rolled up, winch in hand and with an anchor motor or two and about 250
feet of rope and winch wire, Jim's Lightweight showed us that once again
its wheels could move on top of the ground as well as inside it. Johnty Lye
rolled up as well to add to the muscle. Cheers Johnty!

So, that was the day before Windy Hill, sheep burying, winch winding,
spring testing, Cortina loving Saturday! Eat your heart out all you others,
play big boys games.

The day dawned, Sunday, event day; the weather was great, a pitcher
of hot sun poured nationwide over all of God's tiny creatures, except those
within 1 mile of Windy Hill. All those with Infra Red left on by the Army
had a great advantage, radar would have been better, but the world beater
had to be ESP. Where are those sections? Motors fitted with their own
Good Thing had a helping hand, they were shaking the windows going bare-
foot but they still couldn't eyeball a 20 on the sections for the ground
cloud. (Obligatory sentence for unfairly oppressed minorities.)

I believe it was a good do, people came back at dinner time and said
it was. As far as we knew motors had just driven into the mist for 25 yards,
parked up and waited for the marshals to find them!! However, reports of
bent and damaged motors filtered back, so something was going on down
there in that layer of grey.

At the end of the day there was damage to several motors but luckily
no injury. A good cautionary tale was told by the motor with a single piece
windscreen, it was broken in front of the passenger seat - from the inside!
A sudden stop (which wasn't the driver putting his brakes on) combined
with an unbelted passenger caused it. The regs aren't there to make your
head sweat for nothing, they're there to save you. Year before last my own
navigator received a dose of the same thing, only he wasn't wearing a helmet,
(You had to have one, but there was no need to wear it then, except on a
Comp Safari) you can still see the stitch marks and scar. Nobody's been
burnt yet, they will, don't let it be you. Underpants full of unburnt fuel
will make your eyes water and cry for brass monkey weather, but the tears
won't put a fire out.

To help spread the confusion that B.H.2 put about in his Editorial in
the last edition of Double B, Windy Hill is an OPEN event, it is the ONE

and ONLY even  f this type that we run and any off road (or 'on' for
that matter) motor can enter as long as it has a minimum of 4 wheels. It
can be light enough to be picked up, have 13 wheel drive and dumper tyres.
The only scrutineering points are safety ones, fuel tank seals, hand and foot-
brake, fire extinguisher, helmets, roll cage, very basic vehicle safety and of
course the only thing which seems a non-safety item, towing points. In any
and all other Pennine events this is different, NONE of the vehicle/propul-
sion types are allowed and our normal rules about tyres apply.

Oh yes, the Windy Hill report .... In the afternoon a couple of sec-
tions which had proved impossible for a couple of teams were cut out and
the familiar line of motors across the skyline of the hill set off seeming to
sink into the ever present layer of damp greyness. After that, some 1/2 hour
before time, teams started to return, all of the sections completed! Great
stuff, the effort that they had to put in, well done all of them. Prizegiving
came and went, a well attended affair ('cos people couldn't see the way
out!) and everybody agreed that we should stick to having only one motor
in a section at a time. If he gets stuck and his team mates can't pull him
out then its's up to you to help clear the section, not to bludgeon your way
through, scraping motors and nerves. If a section is blocked by a motor you
either go to another one or help to clear that one. It saves us having tem-
pers lost when two motors meet in the middle. Should two motors arrive
at the same time then the marshal is the man to sort it out, not a pair of
flying fists. After clearing the hillside of the debris, once again using Harry's
winch, (next time he'll charge £2/motor to pay for his repairs!) everybody,
for some reason, was able to drive out to the road, whilst doing this watch-
ing B.H.2 towing the trailer out (my front towing point is imaginary) an idea    (
for a new style of event slowly formed. A double headed trailer towing safari.
Just think of the possibilities, a triple header, all side by side, then in line, oh
the mixtures possible! When's the next Gymkhana - what an event!

Thanks for the event go once again to the Drake brothers for supply-
ing us with the land;'most certainly they go to the marshals who, not for
the first time at Windy Hill, could only see their own sections and couldn't
have had a brilliant time. Commiserations to the team who, because of the
fog escaped from the competition area, were bogged down all morning, a
similar problem happened to one of the marshals who was told to 'follow
the wall and your section is on the right,' he wasn't told which wall and
with that visibility and so many walls he was delayed a little in getting to
his section. The last thank you goes out to all of the competitors, the
Pennine will continue to provide the best.


Dicky Day


MSA and ARC club members are welcome to come along and join our events. Phone Mark on 07866 506521 / 01282 703718



Pennine Land Rover Club, Pennine LRC